Basking

Belle takes her toys very seriously. They are her babies.

She absolutely loves to sit outside in the sunshine and enjoy its warmth. Since we are fully taking advantage of the fact that there is still no hint of snow in sight at our house, she gets to spend time outside when Brett is home between classes. Today, she snuck her baby out with her so that it could enjoy the sun, too.

And I was like, Emilioooo!!

There has always been a special place in my heart for the comedic combination of Will Ferrell and Chris Kattan. There is just something about the two of them together in Night at the Roxbury that makes me laugh constantly for the entire ninety minutes. They are the ultimate dynamic duo. I have seen it a million times, which probably explains why I can recite almost every line in the whole movie, and it still never gets old. 

Brett, on the other hand, has never really been a fan of the show. In his defense, I don't think he had ever actually seen it all the way through until the other day. We were hanging out at home a few days ago, and I convinced him to watch it with me. A few minutes into the first scene, I noticed that Brett was laughing a little bit under his breath. I was a happy to see it, but figured that it wouldn't last. However, a few minutes later I noticed him laughing again. This continued on sporadically throughout the whole show, and during some parts he even laughed out loud.

Needless to say, I think we now know what Brett and Chaz are going to be for Halloween next year.

Because we could all use a laugh on Friday....

Last night we were browsing Vimeo, which is a new found love of ours, and found these two little gems.  I could not resist sharing, because as we were watching the first one I started laughing so hard that I had tears rolling down my cheeks. It's so simple, but also so brilliant.

There are two parts in the series, and I can only hope that they will continue on with more. I could watch this little guy for hours.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, Marcel the Shell with shoes on:

MARCEL THE SHELL WITH SHOES ON from Dean Fleischer-Camp on Vimeo.

MARCEL THE SHELL WITH SHOES ON, TWO from Dean Fleischer-Camp on Vimeo.

Quite possibly the best YouTube video of all time

Too cute

This is seriously the cutest damn thing that I have ever seen.  I laughed so hard that it made me cry. I think that every kid should get a chance to be surprised with a trip to Disneyland when they are little.  This is what the pro sports players should be doing with their 20+ million dollar contracts...donating it to little kids.  Instead they sit around bitching and complaining that they don't make enough money and some of us struggle to even pay our bills. Fuckers.

You can't hide from her duck feet

When friends converge and there is alcohol involved, it's inevitable that someone will take a photograph.  It's never really a surprise when you flip through the camera the next morning, because you are doing so expecting to find some incriminating evidence. 

Today, while I was examining the contents of my phone, I found a new avenue for capturing some of this glorious content.  Audio.  My phone came with an app, that until this weekend had never been used, called voice memo.  Apparently during the period of time that we were all inebriated, I discovered this app and decided to record my good friend Kate babbling from the bathroom floor.

I must say, most drunk people slur their words to the point that they are not even recognizable.  Kate doesn't have that problem.  She is the type of drunk whose words you can hear clearly, it's just the content and the way that she mixes it all together that makes no sense. My personal favorite was the two minutes that she spent telling us all how we couldn't hide from her duck feet. 

I'd like to send a special thank you to Kate for entertaining me tonight while I sat at work, listening to this new found audio, waiting for my phone to ring.

If the zombie apocalypse happened tomorrow

I was looking back through my archives today, and I have realized that I don't take pictures anymore. I used to have my camera with me everywhere I went, which in turn gave me a lot more to post about.

I used to be fucking snap-happy.

What the hell changed? I still have a camera, so that's not the issue.

I think that I need to try and motivate myself to start taking pictures again. If I do that, maybe the content on this blog won't be so boring or sparse.

In the spirit of Halloween, I recently downloaded an app for my phone that turns people into zombies. Maybe that's a good place to start.

Zombie Scotherns:

Zombie Schlange's:

Butter Yo Shit!

I came across this video on Dooce the other day and just about died laughing.  Okay, so I didn't just about die, but I did pee my pants a little.

This bitch is funny. 




If you haven't had enough of the hilarity, head on over to her website and watch the other six My Drunk Kitchen episodes: HERE

Adventures

During one of the aforementioned weekends that I spent hanging out with Shay while the guys were slaving away on the Jeep, we decided that we would go see a movie.

After reading through the list of movies that were playing at the theater around the corner from her house we decided on Arthur.

Both Shay and I are fans of comedy, and especially when it's inappropriate comedy. Who is more inappropriate than Russell Brand, you ask? No one.

We arrived about ten minutes before the show was supposed to start and ordered a smorgasbord of junk from the concession stand then made our way to our seats. We were the first people in the theater, so we had our pick of any seats in the house. After we sat down, we started chatting and shortly after, the previews started to roll. It was then that we realized that we were still the only two people in the theater.

We automatically turned into the equivalent of small children and started talking loudly, running around from seat to seat and, of course, doing cartwheels down the center aisle.

We even thought to make a video:

We had a great time acting ridiculous, and the movie was good.  All in all, it was a success.

She Loves Us

Most dogs wouldn't sit still long enough to let you put a hat on their head, let alone sit there with it on while you run and grab your camera and then let you snap a picture.  Belle is a dog that will do whatever she's told, and we take full advantage of her patience.  She may not always look like she's happy about it, but deep down I'm sure that this is one of her favorite things about having us as her humans.  

I love her.

{Halloween}

{Hannah Montana}

{Bellerina}

{Amy Winehouse}

{Karate Kid}

{Bret Michaels}

{Tupac}

Project GP

Brett is not budging on the guinea pig.  He just won't let me have it. I have been going to extremes such as having my best friend call him and proclaim that she believes in her heart that I need one, begging, bartering, and even sending random pictures of guinea pigs to his email throughout the day so that he will realize that they are adorable and we should definately have one.  None of it is working, so now I am taking a different approach. 

Every time I take Belle to the pet store with me she stops to look at the guinea pigs.  They are on the lowest level of cages, which just happens to be at eye level for her.  So now I am using her as bait and trying to convince him that it is not only me who wants a guinea pig.  It's the dog, too.

Here is what happens when two grown ass adults are arguing about whether or not their dog wants a guinea pig for Christmas:

{Brett = Grey / Kaylyn = Green}

Who's side are you on??  Don't you think Brett should buy me a guinea pig?

Merry Christmas!

Love,

The Scotherns

You could save 15% or more on car insurace

One of the reasons that Brett is my hero is because he is always thinking of other people, and putting their needs before his own. Since our Halloween party this year was actually the day before Halloween he offered to work on Halloween night so that other employees that had kids could have the night off to spend the holiday with their families, and take their kids trick or treating.

Since he was going to be working on Halloween he decided that he wanted to dress up to go to work, but he didn't want to wear his Sweeney Todd costume again because it takes a while to pull it all together, and he just didn't want to deal with it. So we spent some time online looking at all of the hilarious costumes that are available, and finally settled on this:

So glad I'm not that desperate

Out of all of the holidays that come and go Halloween always manages to keep me the most busy. It seems like I have been back and forth between the fabric store and the Halloween store about a hundred thousand times in the last two months. You know how it goes when you are working on a project and suddenly you realize that you forgot to buy something and are forced to run back to the store, AGAIN! Oh, that never happens to you? Guess I'm just unprepared.

On Monday night I dragged Kristi and Joeli with me all over Utah county trying to find all of the last minute things I still needed, like oh I don't know, MY HUSBAND'S WHOLE ENTIRE COSTUME!!! Yeah, I'm that far behind. Halloween is only ten days away, and I still haven't been able to find it.

We started at one Halloween store, then the fabric store, then a craft store, and then went to another Halloween store. No luck. So we decided to try Savers. Remind me never to do that again please. I'm not saying that all savers' are bad, but the one by my house is. I don't know if you have ever been in a savers before, but if not, just picture a really dumpy version of DI. They don't organize things very well, the smell when you walk in is enough to make you want to vomit, there are four hundred thousand people crammed into one store at any given moment, the employees are all extremely hostile, and did I mention the smell? It's bad.

We had probably only been there for about five minutes when Kristi leans in and whispers just loud enough for Joeli and I to hear her, that she is disgusted that they sell used bed sheets and comforters in a store like this, I mean come on! That can't be very sanitary. To which I reply that as long as they don't sell used panties, I'm alright. They don't do they?

After our brief exchange about the sheets I browse for maybe another five minutes, and find a jacket that I think might work. I'm standing in line at the register to give one of the aforementioned hostile employees my six dollars so that I can get the hell out of there, when Kristi leans in with another whisper and proclaims, that the answer to my question is yes.

At first I was somewhat puzzled, because I didn't remember asking her a question. Then she gets this really disgusted look on her face and goes; you know, about the panties! I just saw some over there by the bra's.

Forget the smell, because that was the point when I damn near lost my dinner.

Jackson {part 5}

One of the things that we had to buy before we went on our trip to Jackson was a pair of sunglasses that Brett could wear down the river. He has a nice pair of sunglasses that he didn't want to take on the river for fear of losing them. So we had gone to Target a few days before the trip to grab a few other things that we needed, and he found a pair there for $20. Mission accomplished!

The first day down the river we were at the one slow stretch where you can get out of the boat and swim around, and Brett had taken his hat and sunglasses off, and handed them to me to hold for him. The sunglasses must not have been very good quality, what do you expect for $20? When he was pulling them off of his face they broke right at the bridge between the two lenses. Though they were still technically in one piece, they were useless. So after we were done rafting for the day we drove the 15 minutes to the nearest town, and found another pair at a local gas station. They looked similar to the other pair, just plain old black sunglasses, but they were five dollars cheaper. Bonus!

With new glasses in hand the following morning we set off on another rafting adventure. The glasses survived. We got back to camp, had some lunch, and loaded everyone into the truck to make the second run of the day. There is a spot after the two biggest rapids where you can stop to cliff jump, and Brett couldn't resist. So again, he hands me his hat and pulls his sunglasses off. Once again, they broke. He was having the worst possible luck with those damn sunglasses. At least it wasn't his nice pair, for that I was grateful. So once again we ventured into town for a new pair. There really weren't that many to choose from in the first place, but by now there are only like eight pairs left, most of which have reflective lenses, Yuck. We realized that he was going to have to settle for something a little less normal, and venture out of his bubble a little bit. That's when we laid our eyes on these babies:




They looked like they had been shipped in straight from Jamaica. We all had our little jokes about them, and most of us sang the theme from Cool Runnings to him on a daily basis. But, the funniest part is those $10 sunglasses, fit for a Jamaican king, lasted the rest of the trip. So for the next five days, everyone at camp had a good laugh at Brett's expense everytime he wore them, but at least we didn't have to buy anymore sunglasses.

I am not a whore!

This is a video of my Niece Stefanie and her friend Ashley. After they had a few too many drinks one night they decided that they were going to make a music video, and this is what they ended up with. It's pretty awesome.

Revenge of the fallen

Friday night we went to see Transformers 2. We got to the theater about a half hour early, which ended up being a good thing because within about fifteen minutes there wasn't an empty seat in the house. It was packed. A few minutes after we sat down, the seats began to fill up. One couple was heading up the stairs towards us after a few minutes of searching the theater for the perfect seat, they chose the seats right behind us. Shortly after they sat down, this is the conversation we overheard:

Guy: I knew we should've come earlier

Chick: These seats are fine. What's wrong with these seats?

Guy: If we were here sooner we could've got seats in the middle

Chick: {pointing to the center of the theater} Go sit in the middle by yourself!

It was hilarious. Brett and I couldn't stop laughing. That was pretty much all they said to each other the whole time. I can't imagine having such a horrible relationship. I wouldn't be able to handle sitting in silence like that. To me the whole point of going to a movie with someone is being able to spend time with them, and have fun. Whispering things to each other throughout the show, and laughing together. Why even bother if you are just going to be angry the whole time?

Anyway! We really liked the movie, and enjoyed spending time together. It was great!

Clean up on aisle twelve

Last night Brett and I ran to the grocery store to grab a few things. We prefer to shop for a few things here and there, when the need arises, rather than spend hours buying everything we need all at once. We had been shopping for about ten minutes, and had almost everything we needed. Just two more items on the list, and we would be on our way home.

We decided that it would be faster to split up, so I went one way to grab dog treats, and he went another way to grab the milk. Then we were going to meet back in the middle. One problem. I couldn't decide which dog treats to choose. It's a hard decision to make these days, because there are way too many options. How am I supposed to know what is going to taste good to a dog? Maybe she doesn't like the taste of lamb, who am I to decide? As I stood there staring at the selection of dog treats, trying to make a decision, I see Brett out of the corner of my eye. He was apparently much faster with his task than I was with mine, so it was perfect, he could help me decide. I had a bag of Beggin' Strips in one hand, and some rawhide bones in the other hand. Apparently it's too tough a decision for one to make on their own, so I needed backup.

I turn to show him what I am holding, and ask his opinion. Right as I am beginning to speak, I see one of the two gallons of milk he is carrying fall from his hand in slow motion and explode as soon as it hits the concrete floor.


Nothing like this has ever happened to us at the grocery store before, and we reacted in the only way we knew how. Hysterical laughter. I'm sure that the look on both of our faces was priceless.

After the reality of it all set in, Brett found the nearest employee and proclaimed "I made a huge mess." Then we stood near the spill taking full ownership of what happened until the same employee returned with a mop. Then we laughed some more, and continued the conversation about which dog treats to buy.

We ended up going with the Beggin' Strips.

I could've done without the Tarantula's

Saturday we went to a barbecue at Del and Jana's house. They have a zoo. You think I'm kidding? I can prove it. Below is a list of animals they currently own:

Three bearded dragons

A Parrot

Four Parakeets {two of them are babies}

Thirteen of these nasty things

Animals not pictured:

two dogs

two cats

one fresh water fish tank

three salt water fish tanks

and a turtle.

Off his rocker

Brett is always coming up with new ways to potentially injure himself. It is just part of his DNA. His brothers and one of his sisters are the same way. Always looking for the next crazy thing, and they just get crazier and crazier as time goes by. No one in the family knows where it comes from because neither of their parents are what you would call thrill seekers. If I had to make a guess, I would say it comes mostly from their dad. {Sorry Lloyd!} He's a pretty laid back guy, but he was a firefighter and EMT for 23 years, so there has to be some sort of wild hair associated with that kind of intense profession if you ask me.

Since Brett's accident he has become a little less crazy. But the adrenaline junkie in him is not completely gone. Here is a video of his most recent feat of insanity:

Most of you may not think this looks too scary, but the video doesn't really do it justice. It doesn't show you how far away the shed and the pool are from one another{if I had to guess I would say ten feet}. Not to mention the ring of cement that surrounds the pool, and the fact that the pool is only four feet deep.

But then again, I am a chicken.