A look back at 2011

Sitting down to reflect on the year that we had in 2011, I was convinced that it would be tough to find much content. I couldn't really come up with a whole lot off the top of my head, and to be honest, it feels like the year was a cyclone of drama and frustration.

Then I started combing through my archives from the past year.

To my surprise, we had a pretty good year. There was still a fair amount of bullshit and drama, but there were also a lot of really fun memories made. I enjoyed reading the posts again and being able to relive some of the better moments of 2011.

I am really glad to have come across so many good things about the past year, because I was convinced that this one needed to be erased from my memory. Isn't it funny how much the negative weighs in your mind over the good? Even when, as you can see below, the good was pretty damn great.

All in all, I have to say that I have changed my mind since I began writing this post. I am not going to remember 2011 as a horrible year that sucked the soul out of my being. Instead, I will remember it as a great year of firsts, discoveries and fun.

I'm going to try and forget about the bad stuff. It's not worth the pain it causes to remember.

Favorite movie:
Usually we end up with different movies to list as our favorite for the year, however, this year Brett and I both agree that the best movie we saw last year was In Time, I wrote about it here.

Favorite song:
Sail, by AWOLNATION (Brett)
Pumped up kicks, by Foster the People (Kaylyn)

Favorite album:
Lil'Wayne - The Carter IV (Brett)
Coldplay - Mylo Xyloto (Kaylyn)

Highlights:

• We traded my Jetta for a Jeep (here)
• We spent a week in Moab with Chaz and Shay for Jeep Safari (here, here, here, here, here, and here.... what? I really enjoyed myself, and there was a lot to write about.)
• Brett got me a Kindle as a compromise to a much more insane request that I had made (here and here)
• Shay and I threw a murder mystery dinner for our Halloween party this year (here)
• The second annual Mardi Gras Bash at Chaz and Shay's (here)
• We went to the U2 Concert, again with Chaz and Shay (here and here)
• A week of doing nothing in the mountains (here)
• Witches Night Out at Gardner Village with the ladies (here)

Things that we found on the Internet and fell in love with:

• My Drunk Kitchen
• The greatest breakdancing video in the world
• Instagram
• Marcel the Shell, with shoes on
• Vimeo staff picks
• Madeon - Pop Culture
• Sophia Grace Brownlee singing Super Bass, by Nicki Minaj

Tough stuff:

• Losing my Grandpa
• Steve Carrell left The Office
• Being betrayed by family

Cheers to an amazing 2012!!

Dark passenger revealed

If you watch Dexter, and you have not seen this seasons finale, don't read this post. I purposely waited a little while though, so that I wouldn't spoil the ending for anyone who does watch.

Last week we watched the season six finale of Dexter with the Schlange's. Okay, so we didn't watch it with them, but we did watch it at our house at the same time that they were watching it at their house and we spent the whole episode texting back and forth. That's how we do dates these days. What? Commuting is expensive.

The episode moved at the pace that most others usually do, and things were pretty intense the whole time. It's always a nail biter. The texts that we were sending back and forth were mostly a string of predictions and an occasional "oh FUCK!" when something really good would happen.

The whole thing went by way too fast though, and when we realized that there was only a minute and thirty seconds left of the episode, I found myself a little baffled about how they planned on wrapping it up. He still hadn't killed the bad guy, and I was getting a little worried that it might not happen. As he usually does, he was taking time to explain to his victim the reasons that they were lying on his kill table before plunging a knife into their chest. This is always my favorite part. Then, as he was rambling on about how insane Travis was for thinking that the murders he had committed were all part of God's plan, Deb walked into the church where Dexter had set up his kill room.

At this point, I almost had a heart attack. Then, right as Dexter lifted his knife Deb walked in the room and watched him stab the doom's day killer through the chest.

I could not believe it.

With the show having two more seasons left, I am totally baffled. I thought that they would have waited until the last season to reveal who Dexter really is to the people around him. What are they going to do now??? I am seriously dying to see what happens in the next season, and now I have to wait in suspense until next September.

This is going to be a long damn year.

Thank you secret Santa

The secret Santa gift exchange this year was once again a success!  I had so much fun deciding what to send to my recipient, and I hope that she enjoys it! She had my name last year, and I absolutely loved the gift that she sent me so I was really looking forward to sending something fun to her and repaying the favor.

My secret Santa this year really paid attention! I was so stoked to open my package when it arrived to find this:

A bottle of Sparkling Moscato, a pink and black wine case and a pink and black corkscrew.  Seriously awesome.  Thanks to Sun Child for the great gift! I have already polished off the bottle, and it was delish! The case will come in handy quite frequently, and I appreciate that you took the time to make sure that you would send something that I'd really like!! 

Thank you Pserendipity for arranging the exchange again this year, it is so much fun and I am definitely looking forward to next years exchange. 

What a waste of a day

I spent my day Saturday doing some Christmas shopping. It was a nightmare. Will you please remind me next year to get my Christmas shopping done by June?  Please?

The traffic was ridiculous, and parking at any store I went to was nearly impossible. I didn't know that many people even existed in the state of Utah, let alone that it was possible for all of them to occupy one Wal-mart. That was where I drew the line. I walked into Wal-mart and made it about forty feet into the store before I turned around and walked back out. It was a cluster-fuck, and I wanted nothing to do with it. I refused to fight the crowd just to wait in line for an hour to purchase my three items. I'd rather pay a bit more and go to another grocery store.

I think all in all I went to about six stores, yet it took ALL day. I finally got home after being gone for nearly seven hours, and only wanted one thing to ease the pain of it all....vodka.

I don't plan on leaving my house again until Christmas is over.

Hopefully my boss won't mind.....

Secret Santa 2011

It's time for this year's Blogland Secret Santa! Pseredipity has been hosting a Secret Santa gift exchange through her blog for the past three years, and this will be my second year participating. Last year was a blast, so this year I am really looking forward to doing it again. I know who I'm going to be shopping for, and I can't wait to see what she thinks of the gift I choose for her.

I know that it is really helpful for the person you are shopping for to post a few hints, since most of the participants don't know each other, so I figured I'd share some things about myself to make things a bit easier on my Secret Santa.

1. If you haven't already figured it out, I love books. I love to read and someday I hope to write a few of my own. Browsing through bookstores is a favorite past time of mine. I have a small collection of books that are signed by the author and hope to continue expanding that collection. I also have a kindle that I take with me wherever I go.

2. Pink, black and grey are my favorite colors.

3. I love things that keep me warm.  Hoodies, socks, scarfs, blankets, hot chocolate, etc. - I am not a fan of being cold, so anything that will keep me warm is always a bonus. The only thing you shouldn't consider in this category is a Snuggie. It would be a waste of your money.

4. I drink a lot of wine. I drink a lot of anything, really, but wine is a favorite of mine lately. My favorites are Riesling and Moscato. I used to have one wine glass that I would use all the time, but sadly it broke a few weeks ago.  I also collect shot glasses.

5. I love movies. It doesn't matter what genre.

6. I have a serious sweet tooth.

7. I like jewelry. I wear a necklace and earrings every day.  The only type of jewelry I don't wear are rings.  My wedding ring is the only one that adorns my hand.

Dear Secret Santa,
Hopefully this list will help you out with some ideas. Please don't feel obligated to choose something that is related to this list though. I'm sure that whatever you come up with will be wonderful! I look forward to seeing what you pick, and finding out who the hell you are.

Do you dare to take a RISK?

As of last night, when he finally fell asleep around eleven thirty, my poor husband had been awake for close to sixty five hours straight. He woke early Monday morning, and between work and class, he didn't have much free time to work on a big project he had due for his finals. This meant that he really only had the option of working through the night to ensure that it was completed on time.

As I slept, he worked.

I felt so bad each morning when I would awake, and walk down the hall into the office to see him sitting there in front of his computer, still. Lack of sleep has never really taken too much of a toll on him because he has always been somewhat of an insomniac, but I still felt horrible knowing that I was completely rested, and he had been staring at a computer screen all night long while consuming mass quantities of energy drinks. Knowing that he wouldn't even get to take a morning nap, because he had to go to work for the morning and then to class after.

The project was turned in on time, and the teacher proclaimed that it was success. Everyone who has seen it has been impressed with the detail and effort that he put into it. He is definitely an overachiever.

I feel so lucky to have such a dedicated man that I can call my own. He inspires me everyday to become a better person.

For your viewing pleasure, Brett's final project for his AE animation class:


RiskCommercialProject from Brett Scothern on Vimeo.

The contents of my weekend

It was a busy one, that's for sure.

I spent Friday night with Brett trying to help me figure out how to melt chocolate. I know that sounds fucking retarded, but if there is one thing I can say about myself, it is that I don't really know my way around a kitchen. He is a much better chef than I am, so I would not have been able to do this project without him. He was able to figure out what we were doing wrong, and set us back on the right path.

I was making four dozen Oreo truffles for a cookie exchange the next morning, and when the chocolate wouldn't melt right I almost had a mental breakdown. They had to be done that night, because if not I would have nothing to take with me to the party.

Brett had spent the majority of the day, in the midst of finals week, building me the display for my cookies that I had dreamt up the day before and sprung on him like a total asshole. He did it though, and it was so much more amazing than I could have imagined it. Because of him, I won the award for best display at the party:

My vision was Santa's sleigh on a rooftop, being pulled by Reindeer. I'd say he nailed it. 

Then after the cookie exchange was over, Shay and I (FINALLY!) went to see Breaking Dawn, part 1. I had heard mixed reviews about it, so I didn't really know what to expect, but I was pleasantly surprised. As usual. I have really enjoyed the film adaptations of these books and watching them come to life. Now I just have to wait a year to see the next one.  Damn.  

December snuck up on me fast this year

The only snow we have had thus far in 2011....fine by me!

I know that it's December, and there's nothing that I can do about it, but I'm just not ready yet.

I'm not ready for snow. It was supposed to bombard us yesterday, but it didn't come. I can't tell you how relieved I was when I woke up this morning and looked out the window. The fact that there was no snow on the ground meant that I had ten more minutes of sleeping to do because I didn't have to go out and clean the snow off of my Jeep. I'm not going to be happy when it finally does start falling, because if it's held off this long, I have a feeling that means it's going to be a rough winter.

I'm not ready for Christmas. I am usually so excited for Christmas to come that I just can't stand it, but this year for some reason, I'm just not. I didn't put up my tree, instead I am using the wooden tree that Brett built me last year as a cookie display. This year my heart is just not in it. I'm not sure why.

Who knows, maybe I will come out of my funk.  One can only hope.

Mustaches are gross

Someone that we know has recently grown a mustache. No beard, just a mustache. It rests extremely prominent on his upper lip, with nothing else there to help those who look at him make any sense of it. It is all alone, almost as if the rest of his facial hair saw it coming and ran in the other direction.

This person is family.

I am the type of person who tells people what is on my mind, and I don't have a very strong filter. Especially if the thought is in relation to something extremely ridiculous. This no-filter-asshole-behavior has no exceptions for family. If anything, family gets it a little worse than most because they know me, and they know to expect it.

When said family member showed up to Thanksgiving, and I caught sight of the ghastly thing, I blatantly laughed out loud and called him a pedophile as soon as he was within earshot. I felt a little bit like Nelson from the Simpson's, only without the pointing.

Anyone who has a mustache, without an accompanying beard, looks like they should stay the hell away from small children. Even Brad Pitt:

I don't understand this trend, and hopefully I never will. There is just something so wrong about it. It just looks like an extra eyebrow.

Am I the only one who feels this way about them?  Tell me I'm not alone here!

Doing things a little differently

Thanksgiving has never traditionally been a holiday that I look forward to. I don't know about you, but If I am going to spend one day of the year devoted to eating, my food of choice wouldn't be turkey. Pretty much the only thing that I am ever excited to have on Thanksgiving is the stuffing, and I can make that any day of the week.

This year we will be the only ones going out to Brett's parents house, so there's really no sense in making all of that food for just the four of us. I proposed to Brett's mom that we do something different this year, to which she replied: "We will eat whatever you want".

You guys, do you know what this means?

It means that we are going to have pizza for Thanksgiving.

I am a total pizza junkie, so when she gave me the freedom to choose the Thanksgiving meal, I thought that it would be fun if we spent the day together making homemade pizza. Then eating it. Isn't that brilliant?

What are your plans for Thanksgiving? Do you have any traditions?

Something that I will never understand

Why is it that people make such a big deal about black Friday?

You have a nice relaxing Thanksgiving holiday, where you get to spend time with your family and enjoy good food, only to wake up the following morning far too early and go fight crowds of people to get deals on shit that you really don't need.

I remember when my mom used to come home after a long day of black Friday shopping. Exhausted and broke with bags and bags of stuff. Just stuff. Half of the things that she would buy weren't even on the list she had taken with her, and when she got back she would spend the rest of the week trying to decide who she was even going to give all of this stuff to. She didn't need it, she just bought it because it was such a great deal! 

I have only ever ventured out on black Friday once, and it will never happen again.

It was right after we moved in with Brett's sister. She had caught wind of the fact that Joann Fabrics was going to have their flannel on sale for ninety nine cents a yard, and both of us thought it would be totally worth it to go. We were planning on being there as soon as they opened so that we would get a great spot in line and be out of there in no time. If there's one thing that I know now from that experience, it's that things never go according to plan. Ever. When we got there, the doors had only been open for a brief fifteen minutes or so, and we went straight to the cut table to pull a number so that we wouldn't have to wait long once we got our fabric cut. The number that we pulled was something like 107 (come on, how do you expect me to remember the exact number? It was like four years ago.) and they were currently serving guest number 3.

The biggest mistake we made that day was not turning around, right then and there, and walking out of that store.

We started filling a cart with bolts of flannel with all kinds of patterns, there were so many to choose from. By the time we were ready to have our fabric cut, they were only serving guest number 12. We decided to wait it out, because how long could it really take, right? Well when everyone ahead of you has an average of 30 bolts of fabric, it can take a long damn time. Brett kept calling to see where we were, because before I had left the house that morning at 5:00, I had assured him that we would be home by no later than 7:30. I was so wrong. It got so bad that when we were still there, waiting to have our fabric cut and it was only noon, Kristi called a friend of hers who lived in the area and begged her to bring us Cafe Rio. We had no shame. We sat there at the pattern table with our lunch and ate it in front of everyone there.

By the time we got out of there it was almost 2:00 in the afternoon.

Tell me why people do this to themselves year after year, just to save a few bucks. I don't get it. I would rather spend the extra money and shop on a day that there aren't hundreds (thousands?) of other people fighting to get to the same thing.

Are you a black Friday shopper? Why do you do it?

And I was like, Emilioooo!!

There has always been a special place in my heart for the comedic combination of Will Ferrell and Chris Kattan. There is just something about the two of them together in Night at the Roxbury that makes me laugh constantly for the entire ninety minutes. They are the ultimate dynamic duo. I have seen it a million times, which probably explains why I can recite almost every line in the whole movie, and it still never gets old. 

Brett, on the other hand, has never really been a fan of the show. In his defense, I don't think he had ever actually seen it all the way through until the other day. We were hanging out at home a few days ago, and I convinced him to watch it with me. A few minutes into the first scene, I noticed that Brett was laughing a little bit under his breath. I was a happy to see it, but figured that it wouldn't last. However, a few minutes later I noticed him laughing again. This continued on sporadically throughout the whole show, and during some parts he even laughed out loud.

Needless to say, I think we now know what Brett and Chaz are going to be for Halloween next year.

Because we could all use a laugh on Friday....

Last night we were browsing Vimeo, which is a new found love of ours, and found these two little gems.  I could not resist sharing, because as we were watching the first one I started laughing so hard that I had tears rolling down my cheeks. It's so simple, but also so brilliant.

There are two parts in the series, and I can only hope that they will continue on with more. I could watch this little guy for hours.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, Marcel the Shell with shoes on:

MARCEL THE SHELL WITH SHOES ON from Dean Fleischer-Camp on Vimeo.

MARCEL THE SHELL WITH SHOES ON, TWO from Dean Fleischer-Camp on Vimeo.

Refreshing

For the past three months or so, I have been working four ten hour shifts at work so that I could have Friday's off.  I was convinced that a three day weekend would be the answer to my prayers. At first it was nice having an extra day off every week, and I thought that I was living the life.

Let me just tell you how wrong I was.......

I was working until 8:00 every night, and by the time my forty minute commute was over all motivation had been long gone. I never really did anything productive when I got home and stopped working out, so I wasn't feeling up to par. Sure, I got to sleep in a little bit each day and didn't have to go to work on Friday's, but what good is being off on Friday when your husband works or has school all day and your best friend lives an hour and a half away?  No good. 

I have recently changed my schedule so that I am working earlier, five days a week, and I am off each day by 3:30 or 4:00. It's still new, but man is it making a huge difference in my day.  I get to see my husband more often, and actually eat dinner with him at a reasonable hour on occasion. I am less bitchy. What?  I can admit that ten hour days doing customer service on the phones makes me bitchy.  I feel like I have so much more time in my day, and yesterday I got to do something that I haven't been able to do for a while...read. I got my house cleaned, and some laundry done, then while Brett was working on homework I actually took some time to read. I have been working on the same book now for so long that I am starting to forget how it started.

It's going to be great to have myself back. I miss being a productive wife. Wait. Brett, was I a productive wife before?

Don't answer that....

In Time

As someone who loves to write, I find myself noticing that there are more movies than not that are a repeat of some other story that is already in existence. It's very rare to find an original storyline, so when I do, I get pretty excited.

Going into this movie, I wasn't really sure what to expect.  The previews were just vague enough that you didn't really have a grasp of how intense the plot was going to be, but it drew you in and peaked your interest. I had this whole other idea in my brain of the direction it was going to take. I think that is part of what I loved about it though. As we were watching it, I had no idea what to expect so it made things that much more exciting for me.

The only criticism that I really have, is that I wish the leading lady was not Amanda Seyfried. I'm not really a fan of her acting, and that wig just looked ridiculous. I would have much rather watched him get naked in the ocean with Olivia Wilde who, oddly, was cast as his mother instead of his love interest. I would've done it the other way around. Everyone else, in my opinion, was cast brilliantly.

I love it when a movie challenges my brain like this one did. I can only hope that there will be others just as good.  I am not looking forward to the day when time is our currency.

Have you seen it?  What did you think?

Quite possibly the best YouTube video of all time

Who dunnit?

This year's Halloween party was a Murder Mystery dinner. It was a lot of work to put it all together, but in the end it was worth the effort. The costumes turned out amazing, and everyone did a great job with their characters. 

The hostess of the evening:

Shay's character was Countess Bathory, a 16th century mass murderess.

As usual, Shay went all out on the decor, and it turned out so beautiful:

Here are some pictures from the evening:

 Kaylyn and Shay

 Amber and Kaylyn

 Teri and Kaylyn

Kaylyn, Brandi and Kate

 The guys - Danny, Chaz, Mike, Brett, Ryan and Nick

Kaylyn, Shay, Jen and Kate

The company that we ordered the party kit from was a little disorganized, so a lot of work went into rewriting the clues and the format in which their questions and answers were set up was a bit scattered. I really enjoyed writing the character stories though, and I am seriously thinking about making my own Murder Mystery dinner party business. It would be a great creative outlet. 

Overall, I am so glad that we opted to go with the Murder Mystery theme, and I really do think that we will do it again next year. 

I want to send a special thanks to Chaz and Shay for always hosting these great shindigs!  Maybe next year we'll live closer and I can host so that you two can take a break. 

I am the luckiest girl alive

If it wasn't for him, I'd be completely lost.

He has done so much for me in my life, and has made so many sacrifices for us to better our situation.  He is the most thoughtful person I know.  I've never met anyone who works harder than he does. He would go to the end of the earth and back to help someone that he loves, and he would give anyone the shirt off his back if they needed it. 

It's hard for me to imagine what life would be like without him.  I have known him for almost half of my life, and I can't even remember what things were like before he was here. I don't want to.  He is my number one fan, and he encourages me to be the best person that I can be. He supports anything I do, and that means the world to me.

The best thing about him though, is the incredible amount of fun we have together. I can't even begin to tell you how often he makes me laugh. I love spending my days off with him, even if we are just hanging out at home.  He is my favorite person in the whole world!

I love him completely.

Happy birthday love!  I hope that this one is the best one yet.

The time has come

Tonight, all of our hard work will finally pay off.  We have been slaving away in preparation for this dinner, and it is going to be killer. (pun intended)

Clues are hidden, queue cards are written and the costumes are all complete. I think this year, I can safely say that we will not be scrambling to the last minute to get everything ready. It feels nice to be prepared for once.

The only thing that makes me a little sad, is that Halloween is almost over. I'm dying to know, what are you going to be for Halloween this year?? 

The evening of the enchantress

It has become a tradition for us to attend Witchapalooza at Gardner Village each October, and this year we actually went on Witches Night Out.

I have never seen so many grown-ass women in costumes in one place.  It was amazing.

If you live in Utah, are a fan of Halloween and have never been to Witches Night Out, I highly recommend it for next year! You see so many awesome costumes, the shops are incredible and if you choose to go to the dinner show, there's also great food and entertainment!

There are some professional witches, who go all out on their characters:

Then you get to see a bunch of amateur witches:



I could not believe the effort that went into some of the costumes we saw this year! I would love to be a professional GV witch! Thanks to Shay for making it possible! Every year she orders our tickets way in advance to make sure that we have good seats for the show. I love that we have found this little gathering, and hope that the tradition continues!

My weakness is that I care too much

"When I shut my mouth, and turn to walk away, it doesn't mean you've won. It simply means your stupid ass isn't worth anymore of my time."

I have spent so much of my life trying to make sure that other people are happy that it has finally taken it's toll and is starting to make me bitter. Thank god I have finally opened my eyes and come to the realization that people change, no matter how hard you try. Their actions are beyond my control, and I can no longer exhaust all of my effort by trying to make things stay the same.

I have recently gone through some family drama, that for some reason unknown to me, has caused the relationship that I once had with my sister to fall apart completely. It's been months since we've spoken and she has no idea how terrible all of this has made me feel, but only because she doesn't care enough to try and find out. I have spent so much time trying to get a hold of her in every way I know possible, only to have no luck whatsoever. I have her address, but I just don't think that showing up on her doorstep is going to change anything.

I have always been the mender.

I try so hard to pick up the pieces and put them back together when things fall apart, and it just makes me angry and hurt when the other people don't seem to care as much as I do. Still, I call and make the effort to keep the relationships strong and continue to keep pushing forward despite the betrayal and hurtful words that have been hurled in my direction. I have always felt that if I just keep on trying, the other person will eventually come around.  Now I know that is not the case. Some people are just hopeless.

Three females in my life lately have basically become void of emotion and began to let our bond disintegrate completely with no explanation. I have, until now, given it my all to attempt stitching up the tears that have been carelessly created in the fabric of the relationship, but it's too late. As much as it breaks my heart to do so, I have to let go or I will lose my fucking mind.

I just wish I knew how to make myself forget the way they have. To come to a place where I don't give a damn either. On the other hand, then I would be a soulless monster too, and I don't want that.

Instead I will just continue to nurture the relationships of those who still matter and try to tuck the others away, somewhere in the back of my mind.

Dearest Shay,

Today is a BIG day!!

Today you hit a milestone.

Today you turn 30!!

I am sad that I can't be with you guys today, but I am happy that you are spending your big day in the happiest place on earth!  I know that there is no where in the world you would rather be today, and that makes my heart happy. A little jealous, but happy none the less.

I know Chaz isn't quite the Disneyland companion that I would be, so I have to apologize for that, but I know that you will be able to forgive me for not being there. There's always next year.

When you get home, as you know, there are great things for us to look forward to in celebration of your new chapter in life, and I cannot wait to experience them with you! You are the best friend that I could have ever hoped for, and I love you more than you will ever know.  I am so lucky to have you in my life, and I don't think that you realize all that you do for me. 

Happy birthday buddy!  I hope that this is your best birthday yet!! You totally deserve all of the happiness in the entire world.

Love,

Kaylyn

Have I ever mentioned to you guys that I am not a fan of Monday's?

There are too many reasons to name. 

Today specifically though, it could have a lot to do with the fact that I am sitting here at work, and Chaz and Shay have been in Disneyland for the last eight hours.  We were really hoping to be able to go with them this year, however, things didn't seem to go as planned. We spent the majority of this past weekend hanging out with them and wrapping up preparation for the murder mystery dinner next weekend, talking frequently about how jealous I was that they would be spending the week in Disneyland.

Then last night, I had a dream that Brett decided that he was going to fly out to California and join them, leaving me behind because I couldn't get the time off of work.  That's just fucking rude. He kept sending me videos of the three of them on rides, taking pictures with Mickey Mouse, and rubbing it in that I was not there with them. 

Then I woke up.

Which brings me to the next thing that I don't like about Monday....it means the weekend is over.

What did you do this weekend?

Too cute

This is seriously the cutest damn thing that I have ever seen.  I laughed so hard that it made me cry. I think that every kid should get a chance to be surprised with a trip to Disneyland when they are little.  This is what the pro sports players should be doing with their 20+ million dollar contracts...donating it to little kids.  Instead they sit around bitching and complaining that they don't make enough money and some of us struggle to even pay our bills. Fuckers.

You can't hide from her duck feet

When friends converge and there is alcohol involved, it's inevitable that someone will take a photograph.  It's never really a surprise when you flip through the camera the next morning, because you are doing so expecting to find some incriminating evidence. 

Today, while I was examining the contents of my phone, I found a new avenue for capturing some of this glorious content.  Audio.  My phone came with an app, that until this weekend had never been used, called voice memo.  Apparently during the period of time that we were all inebriated, I discovered this app and decided to record my good friend Kate babbling from the bathroom floor.

I must say, most drunk people slur their words to the point that they are not even recognizable.  Kate doesn't have that problem.  She is the type of drunk whose words you can hear clearly, it's just the content and the way that she mixes it all together that makes no sense. My personal favorite was the two minutes that she spent telling us all how we couldn't hide from her duck feet. 

I'd like to send a special thank you to Kate for entertaining me tonight while I sat at work, listening to this new found audio, waiting for my phone to ring.

Crunch time

With one week left until Witches Night Out, I still had a lot of sewing to do, so my plan was to spend the majority of the weekend sewing. Doesn't it suck when things don't go according to plan? 

I got quite a bit done on Friday while Brett was at work, and then we packed everything up and headed to Ogden to see our favorite friends.  Friday night was spent mostly planning what we were going to accomplish Saturday, and my costume was at the top of that list.  Halloween is one of those times of year where I just have way too much going on.  I always over commit myself to projects, but this year I feel like everything, though there is a lot of it, will be easily managed if I just stay on top of it. 

Saturday morning threw a little wrench into my plans..... my sewing machine broke. 

It took a good part of the morning, but my handy husband finally fixed it, and sewing continued.  Then a little while later, it stopped working again all together and I was so frustrated at that point that I just gave up.  I don't deal well under pressure when there is a deadline to meet, and I can't very well go to Witches Night Out naked.  I don't think anyone would appreciate that.

Sunday, all was well again because I took Shay's sewing machine home with me and was able to finish my costume and get Brett's mostly done. 

I can't wait for next Saturday to post the pictures of our costumes! 

This is seriously the first year that I'm not out shopping or sewing the day before our Halloween party to try and get my costume done.  I'm a procrastinator.

What are you going to be for Halloween this year?

If the zombie apocalypse happened tomorrow

I was looking back through my archives today, and I have realized that I don't take pictures anymore. I used to have my camera with me everywhere I went, which in turn gave me a lot more to post about.

I used to be fucking snap-happy.

What the hell changed? I still have a camera, so that's not the issue.

I think that I need to try and motivate myself to start taking pictures again. If I do that, maybe the content on this blog won't be so boring or sparse.

In the spirit of Halloween, I recently downloaded an app for my phone that turns people into zombies. Maybe that's a good place to start.

Zombie Scotherns:

Zombie Schlange's:

The fever has set in

I am consumed with thoughts of All Hallows' Eve.

Planning has commenced for this year's festivities and the construction of my costume is well under way. Decor has emerged from it's resting place and taken up residence among the other items that usually adorn my living room. It's the best time of year.

This year there is not going to be a huge blow out party like we usually do. Instead, Shay and I are hosting a murder mystery dinner. We only invited 16 people, so it's going to be a little more low key than usual, but I am convinced that it will be the most amazing Halloween get together to date. We have our work cut out for us over the next five weeks though, but it will all be worth it in the end. We have divided up the work load between the two of us, and it seems as though there is no possible way that we will have it all done in time. I know we will, but right now there is no end in sight. I think that this is what I live for though, the chaos of the season, and the payoff when all of the hard work is done.

My character for the event is Belladonna Erotica, a 19th century Italian murderess. I have a vision in my head of what the costume should look like, and I am hoping that I can pull it off. I found some amazing fabric the other day, and it is going to make all of the difference in the world. I cannot wait until it's complete. Sometimes I wonder why I don't just buy my costumes, because I tend to get in a little over my head every year. I just know that a store bought costume is not as awesome as something that I can tell people that I made. It gives me a greater sense of accomplishment.

October is officially my favorite month.

Losing My Faith in Humanity

Betrayal is hurtful, but it hurts the most when it comes from someone that you genuinely believed that you could trust. It stings like salt in an open wound.

She has been there for me most of my life, and her age surpasses mine by more than a decade. I thought that she was smart, but it turns out I was very wrong. How could she do something so vicious, and not even stop to consider the impact that it would have on everyone else involved. It wasn't only herself that she was fucking over. There were two more of us, waiting to learn what she had done. Her own siblings.  The people that have been there, by her side for a lifetime, trying to help make sense of all the bullshit right along with her. People who genuinely loved her.

It makes it worse that she didn't have the balls, still doesn't, to call and tell me what she did herself. She can't even bring herself to utter the words. I had to find out through a random phone call from a stranger.  Someone that I had never spoken to before in my life, and he laid it on me like a ton of bricks. My inheritance was gone with one careless act from the bitch that I used to call my sister. Too selfish to let on to the fact that she was drowning financially. Too proud to ask for help. Too cowardly to tell the truth after all was said and done. We trusted her, and took her word for it far longer than we ever should have. Turns out she was nothing more than just a thief and a liar. Words that she had used to describe the common enemy that we shared in my mother's husband. A man we all hated, her more than the rest of us, yet here we are and those words fit her like a glove. Liar. Thief. Coward.

She packed up and moved away, not leaving a trace of evidence as to where she has gone. Her phone number has changed, and she is no longer responding to emails. It is as if she has vanished. I almost wish she really would.

If I had the chance to speak to her, just one more time. I would ask her why she did it, and beg her to give me some sort of justification. Even though I know there is none. I want to know what the fuck she was thinking when she signed the paperwork that sealed our fate without even having the decency to let us know what was coming. I thought that's what family was all about. Communication, and for god's sake, honesty. I guess that, up until this point anyway, I have suffered from an altered perception of what reality is. A place that you could trust people, a place that apparently doesn't exist.

I am done exhausting effort to try and get a hold of her, and I am accepting the fact that she and I will never speak again. I will never know why she did it. I will be left to continue assuming. I will be left to live with the fact that my own sister fucked me over worse than any stranger ever could.

I am erasing her from my life.

Night and Day

Something that I failed to mention in my previous post about our camping trip was the final hike that we went on a few days after we took Belle home.  The reason that I have waited to post about it, is because I was hesitant to let you in on a secret of mine.   

Let me explain.

A few years ago, Brett and I went on a bike ride.  If you have been a long time reader, or possibly sifted through the archives, you probably know where I am going with this one.... If not, take a quick pause and read this.

Remember now? Yeah, that.

Okay, now that you are acquainted (or reacquainted, rather) with our first encounter with the trail I am going to tell you about, we can continue.

Turns out, when I posted about the trail the first time, I was being a little dramatic.  What?  I can admit when I'm being ridiculous if I want to...... It's true though.  I had a serious case of over exaggeration, mostly because I was bitter about the situation. 

About half way through our camping trip, we made the mutual decision that we needed to make another attempt at conquering the aforementioned trail.  It would be a lot different this time, because I would not be stuck pushing my bike the whole way, and we were going to pack more water.  The trail was not going to win. 

This time around the trail was pleasant.  It was tough in some spots, but seriously so much more enjoyable!  We had great conversation the whole way, mostly reminiscing about the first time, and the views were amazing. I don't think that we even stopped when we were up there before to enjoy any of it.  There were no injuries involved, and no crying on my part. That right there has to say something! This time we also wised up and took the GPS with us to map out the trail and see how far it actually was. 

Would you like to take a guess at how many miles it really was?

We were told that it would be ten miles, ended up thinking that it was more like twelve miles, and we now know that it was just under six miles.  SIX! That's it. Here is the GPS image of the trail:

The only part that sucked at all was the last ten or so minutes.  We were in an open area, with no tree cover, walking uphill.  The majority of the trail had some gorgeous tree cover, and there was wildlife running around all over the place.  We even took a second to stop for a picture in the same spot as last time:

I would definitely do it again, as long as there is not a mountain bike involved, and next time we will probably take Belle with us. She would have loved it. 

Back within the grasp of reality

Waking up in the morning to the sound of the river, rolling along the rocks, just fifteen feet away from our tent was so calming. It was just what we needed. It's good to be home, though.

The first day consisted mostly of setting up the campsite the way we wanted it, and gathering firewood.  Brett made a pretty impressive woodpile to get us through the week, and we were lucky to have his dad's chainsaw to make things go quicker than trying to cut up six dead trees with just an axe.

We took Belle with us, which we had never done before.  Don't ask me how we have gotten through seven years of owning a dog without taking her camping, because I have no idea.  Usually when we go, it's just for one night, so we find someone to watch her for us.  Needless to say, we were a bit worried about how well she'd do.  She is such a princess.  I mean, we are talking about a dog who cannot sleep without a pillow under her head, or at least a blanket.

She surprised us the first night by investigating the wilderness surrounding our campsite.  Though she never strays too far from sight, she got a lot more brave than I expected that she would. She was off into the stream, traipsing through the weeds, and even laying in the dirt despite the fact that we had a blanket on the ground for her just ten feet away.  She seemed like she was loving it, and was born to be outside, so the next morning we decided we were going to take her on a hike.  She loved every minute of it!  Towards the end of the hike, we came across a water trough that had been placed just off of the trail for the people who rode through on their horses.  Belle was in heaven.

After we got back to camp though, she decided that she was ready for a nap in the comfort of the front seat of the Jeep.

The next morning, she was not a happy camper.  After we woke up, she was walking like her feet were bothering her, and she was sick.  We decided that it would probably be best if we took her home. She was clearly not having fun anymore, and I worried that maybe she had eaten a plant or bug that had made her sick.  She looked and acted miserable. We took the short twenty minute drive down the canyon to drop her off at home.  Brett lifted her up out of the back of the Jeep and set her on the grass, and it was as if someone had flipped a switch.  She was no longer walking like her feet hurt, and she acted like she was just fine.  I am convinced that she was just trying to manipulate us so that we would feel guilty and take her home.  We totally fell for it.

One thing that we learned during our week of roughing it, is that we are totally not cut out for long term camping for a few reasons.  There were two times that we came back into town after we brought the dog home, to get ice or other things that we had forgotten.  We also rely too heavily on technology.  We took a generator with us so that during the hot times of the day we could sit under the shade of the canopy and watch movies or play Pac Man on the laptop.  We also used said generator to run a fan to cool us off and charge our phones when they were losing battery power.  Who the hell knows how we would ever survive without electricity.  I guess that's why we decided to only camp twenty minutes up the canyon from where we live.

Some other things we learned on this camping trip:

• Mosquito's are not repelled by mosquito repellent or citronella.
• Flies are a pain in the ass, however, they are repelled by smoke from the campfire.
• Dogs should not eat whole corn cobs, so don't throw them in the fire pit or on the ground.
• Two humans can consume $150.00 worth of cheap liquor in five days.
• Hiking in the blistering hot sun is only fun for the first 5 miles.

All in all, the camping trip was exactly what we needed, and we had a ton of fun!  I think that we are going to try and make it a tradition that we go camping for a week each summer.  I love spending time with my husband in nature.

Dear mom,

Happy birthday. 

I cannot believe that time is continually moving on without you here.  I think about you everyday, and it's still hard to believe that you aren't coming back. I hope you know that we are celebrating for you in our own way tonight, even though you won't be there to enjoy it.  We are going to have fun and remember the way things used to be.  The way they should be, still.

I love you so much, and miss you more than words can express.

Love,
Kaylyn

Simplicity

In a few short days, Brett and I will be heading off on a week long camping trip.  Just us and our dog.  It's going to be glorious.

This break from everything that makes my life hectic is so needed right now, and I look forward to soaking in every minute of it.  I don't care what the weather is going to be like. I don't care that I will be cut off from technology and the rest of the world. I don't care that the closest thing to a shower I will have is a box of wet wipes. I don't care about any of that, because all that matters is that the two most important beings in my life will be there with me. 

The two of them are all I need to be happy.

Instagram

I recently stumbled across this new app for my phone that I am loving. It's a photo sharing app that allows you to add effects to your pictures, as well as a social networking type of photo sharing. As far as I know, right now it is only available on the iPhone, but they are in the works for apps that will work on other phones as well.

I'm not too interested in gaining followers or following others, unless they are people that I know, but I do love how great the pictures look when you add the effects. Have you tried it? What do you think?? 

Here are a few of my favorites that I've played with so far:

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Sunset near my house

Indian Paintbrush in Moab

The stage at the U2 concert

Belle

Brett and I on the beach in Carmel, CA circa 2007

Mardi Gras 2011

Blurs

Life moves too fast most days. 

I don't always have a chance to sit down and write.  That makes me sad.  It seems like the older I get, the less time I have in my day.  When I fail to accomplish something that I needed to get done because I didn't have enough time, I get so frustrated.  I wish that I could just take the clock and slow it down, temporarily of course.

Do you think that Hermione Granger will let me borrow her time turner?  I bet I could get more done in the day if I had one of those in my possession.

Butter Yo Shit!

I came across this video on Dooce the other day and just about died laughing.  Okay, so I didn't just about die, but I did pee my pants a little.

This bitch is funny. 




If you haven't had enough of the hilarity, head on over to her website and watch the other six My Drunk Kitchen episodes: HERE

Indian Paintbrush

My mom absolutely loved wildflowers. If you had asked her what her favorite flower was, wildflowers would have been her response. She loved anything that grew wild in nature.

Her favorite wildflower was the Indian Paintbrush.  Whenever I see one now it reminds me of her, and I think about all of the memories that I have of my childhood when we would stop to pick one anytime we saw them.  It didn't matter if we were camping or driving through the canyon, she would always stop. Her favorite thing to do was take them home and press them, but the first thing she would do was take a small piece of the flower and stick it behind my ear. Every time.  

In Moab, the desert is sprinkled with Indian Paintbrush. Every time I saw one while we were out on the trails I had an urge to get out of the Jeep and take a picture.  After the first twenty, I started to realize that it was a little excessive, so I stopped.  It's funny how the little things in life make you remember the ones that we've lost.  To anyone else it's just a little red flower, but to me it's so much more than that.  It's like having a little piece of her there.

Inconsistencies

Last night after Brett got home from work we decided it was time for a snack, so we headed off to Smith's Marketplace down the street from our house. Brett grabbed a six pack and I got some ice cream. Quick trip to the store, and we'd be on our way in a matter of minutes.

Or not.

We got up to the self check out to pay, and when the machine prompted, the cashier working in that area came over to check Brett's ID. After handing his ID to her, she turned to me and asked for mine as well. I told her that I didn't have my ID with me, and she quickly advised us that she could not sell us the beer if we didn't both have our drivers licenses with us.

In the three years that this store has been open, we have never had this problem. Usually they ask the person who is purchasing the beer and that is it. In a few instances I have even been by myself buying beer and the cashier has not asked me for my ID at all. When we brought this to the cashiers attention she still wouldn't budge.

Management was involved and the cashier and managers that we were speaking with kept referring to the fact that they couldn't sell the beer to us due to a state law that prohibited it if we didn't both have ID.

We ended up leaving, sans beer, to go home and get my ID so that I could abide by their rules and prove that I was, in fact, old enough to buy beer.

We wouldn't want to break any laws now, would we?

Upon returning to the store after retrieving my ID, we gathered our items again and headed back up to the front to pay. When we got up to the cash registers, we chose another line to go through so that we didn't have to talk to the previous cashier again. She had been a real bitch, and I wasn't in the mood to hear more of her shit.

We put the beer and ice cream on the belt and waited our turn to pay. When we approached the register we were greeted by the new cashier and she began ringing up our items. She asked Brett for his ID and then continued to ring us up. Without asking me for my ID.

Before the transaction was complete, the cashiers phone rang. When she picked it up, we knew exactly what was happening. The managers that we had spoken with earlier, who were standing up at the front of the store, were apparently panicking because they knew that she hadn't ID'd both of us.

I was so pissed. I had gone home, and come back to the store because I was assured that there was no other way for us to leave that store with a six pack in hand.

Then the new cashier went ahead and totally proved us right.

As mad as I was that they had wasted 45 minutes out of my day, I couldn't have been happier with the outcome. We ended up taking the phone number of their store director and you better believe that he will be hearing about the way that we were treated by his employees.

Music in my soul

Last night we met up with Chaz and Shay downtown for the U2 concert. 

When we walked into the stadium, the stage was so massive that it took my breath away.

Not only was their stage enormous, but the colors on the whole thing changed for every song they sang and the big circular screen in the middle was on tracks moving up and down for the latter half the show. The visual of it all was so amazing.